chapter 11 oldest old and caregiving wk 6

Chapter 11 talks about adult children as caregivers, it says " nearly 30 percent of aging person who need home care receive it from adult daughters, 23 percent from wives, and 20 percent  from more distant female relatives or female nonrelatives." it states the greatest strain seems to be upon "women in the middle" middle aged women who have children and jobs and responsible for the home care of parents.
The fact is that taking care of elderly parent is one of the hardest thing to do, that was the case with our mother.
The emotional side of taking care of her was hard because we need to do a job well but also she was our mother and sometimes so would not allow us to help her, she would say am your mother your can't tell me what to do, or she just refused to do anything. The stresse and strain that was place on the caregiver is very high, everyone is looking at you, or telling what they think you should do or not do but not every one pulling their weight.  According to Hiller & Barrow " a fierec tangle of emotions comes with parenting one's parents: anguish, frustration, inadequacy, guilt."  (p310).  Most of the time being stress was because most was not doing all that they said they would do, have to always pick up the slack, one become burden down the author call this stress overload, which is a true fact, as stated in the book taking care of a parent can be rewarding for many adult childern, it come with a price to pay, not being their for your own family,and spouse, you are pulled in so many directions by so many people is very emotional at times but than you pick your self up and keep going becaue my mother need you to be there for her and speak for her as well.
Finaly take time for your self, don't be afarid to ask for help, an seek some outside support from a support group who knows what you are deal going through, if you do this it will be a great benefit in the long run.