Death and dying is a topic many people often try to avoid. Chapter 14 gives enlightening information on the emotions, confusion, and aspects that go into death and dying that allow us as individuals to better understand it. Hillier and Barrow (2011) explain that death avoidance is not unique to today's society; the thought of death and the unknowable produces anxiety and the only way to become free of this is to immerse ourselves in all aspects of death in order to better understand it.
Old people are commonly stereotyped as waiting "fearlessly" for death, however, fear of death is a normal human condition and many believe that older people may in fact fear death even more because they are closer to it (Hillier & Barrow, 2011). The chapter goes on to explain that with this fear and the process of dying comes certain stages of grief. Denial and shock, anger, bargaining, depression, and acceptance make up the emotions that many experience when being faced with death, or the death of a loved one (Hillier & Barrow, 2011).
Caring for the dying can prove to be an obstacle in itself as well. The type of care and relationship between the patient and caregivers highly depends on the level of awareness that the patient is experiencing pertaining to their condition. For example, closed awareness refers to those patients who are unaware that they are going to die, while open awareness refers to when both, the patient and staff are openly aware that the patient is dying (Hillier & Barrow, 2011).
When death can be discussed and accepted the planning stages are often much easier on both the patient and their family. "Realizing that death is the ultimate destiny for each of us, we need to understand, regardless of our age, the importance of preparing for it" (Hillier & Barrow, 2011, p. 398). Advanced directives, living wills, power of attorneys, and funeral arrangements can lighten the stress load significantly since these factors allow plans to be made and followed ahead of time (Hillier & Barrow, 2011). By having plans made and carried out, loved ones are able to grieve properly for their loss, without the added stress of confusion and conflict pertaining to arrangements and material items. This is important for people of all ages, death is something we must all face eventually and to be educated on the topic will only allow us to feel more at ease.
Hillier, S. & Barrow, G. (2011). Aging, the individual, and society. 373-400. 9th ed. California: WADSWORTH.
Fearing death is common and the theories of the process of dying are normal to feel. I agree with you and think it is important to immerse ourselves in all aspects of death in order to better understand it. There are different specific fears that people express. For example, fear of pain and suffering is common. The fear of the unknown is common because death is not understood. Fear of nonexistence is the fear of ceasing to exist after death. There is also the fear of eternal punishment for their actions. And it can be “shared among nonreligious as well as religious people” (p.378). Fear of loss of control can also be felt. And we can fear what will happen to our loved ones. Not knowing what will happen to those that depend on us can be stressful. And of course not everyone will feel all of this but as you said, death is something we all must face eventually. We might not know how we will eventually die but we all know one day it will happen and the more prepared we are for it then the better it can be.
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