Chapter 7 hit on a very important topic that is, in my opinion, too often over-looked. Intimacy and the need for companionship with others is something that's highly important to the older population. "The number of friends and active family relationships a person has traditionally has been viewed as an indication of how well an individual is aging" (Hillier & Barrow, 2011, p. 172). Along with intimacy, it is equally important to be aware of the sexual needs for this population as well. Hillier and Barrow (2011) stress that we are sexual beings, regardless whether we develop a chronic illness, lose a spouse, suffer from a mental illness, or live a solitary life.
Certain situations or events may indeed put restraints on the ability to engage in intimate relationships, but this does not decrease the need for strong social bonds. By maintaining strong social bonds with others it enhances the psychological well-being of elders and reflects a positive self-concept (Hillier & Barrow, 2011). A certain level of enjoyment is met when close relationships are maintained at an older age and as we've learned in previous chapters, a healthy mind is half the struggle to a positive aging experience.
As intimacy ties into sexuality, it does not necessarily mean sexual intercourse; it could mean touch, emotional closeness, or perhaps, a combination of the three (Hillier & Barrow, 2011). Nevertheless, it's important to be aware that these factors are important to the aging population. If not made aware of this concept, more and more elderly people will become sexually invisible, in other words, they are not viewed as being sexual which can result in embarrassment on their behalf (Hillier & Barrow, 2011). Too often we do not put ourselves in others' shoes, and in this case, we will eventually be in this position in our own shoes, and we will want younger generations to understand our needs. The information shared in this chapter is not only be helpful for future social workers, but for the general public to be aware of for a number of reasons, most importantly, perhaps, to understand that the need for intimacy and closeness does not diminish over time. Individuals measure their happiness with intimacy and sexuality on different scales, "If being sexy is measured by frequencies of orgasms and other quantitative counts, sexuality may show some decrease with age. But if sexuality refers to one's sensuality, then most adults become more sexual with age" (Hillier & Barrow,2011, p. 195). This proves that we as a younger population should refrain from judging those that are older, because there is no telling how we will measure our own happiness as it pertains to this issue until we reach that age.
Hillier, S.,& Barrow, G. (2011). Aging, the individual, and society. (9th ed., pp. 172-198). California: WADSWORTH
I agree that intimacy and the need for companionship in the elderly is too often over-looked and we should be aware that the need for intimacy is present in the elderly. Losing a spouse because of death or divorce can make it hard to fulfill the need for intimacy and can lessen the need for it but the need does not go away. Intimacy may include sexual intercourse but it can include other things like you mention, touching or emotional closeness. You are right, it is important to be aware of these factors so senior citizens are not sexually invisible. According to our text, in nursing homes, “when residents hold hands or say they want to marry, this may evoke laughter and sarcastic remarks, leading to humiliation. Treating an aged man and women like children because they want to hold hands or embrace is insulting and robs the older adult of an important aspect of identity” (p.196). I find this statement sad because everyone needs intimacy and no one should be made fun of due to wanting to feel close to someone else especially when they are elderly and may not have too many years left.
ReplyDeleteI agree it is definitely something that we overlook too often. Older people are just like us. They have wants, need, and biological urges just like we do. And I agree with your statement that certain situations or events may indeed put restraints on the ability to engage in intimate relationships, and you're this does not decrease the need for strong social bonds. I enjoy that you put the quote from the book, By maintaining strong social bonds with others it enhances the psychological well-being of elders and reflects a positive self-concept. With your statement about what defines sexuality, I personally believe that it should not be measured by orgasms or anything else but by sensuality. Great post!
ReplyDeleteI also agree the aspect of the older population being intimate or being sexually active is seldom considered by the general population. Many people view the elderly has having no desires or interest of being involved with someone on an intimate level. As human beings, these desires merely do not diminish as we age. The importance of having a close bond with something, in this writer's viewpoint, only increases as a person ages. Companionship and sharing life experiences as we age can be extremely beneficial. Many seniors are faced with dealing with the loss of a spouse or friends, declines in health, or feelings of isolation or loneliness; as you pointed out in your post, that by maintaining strong social bonds with others enhances the psychological well-being of elders. Forming intimate relationships can help reduce these feelings and provide a positive outlook on life as seniors go through the aging process.
ReplyDelete